When custody is shared w/non-plant-based parent(s)

[MoniDew]

I'm certainly not the only person with this issue. I am the paternal grandmother of a lil' guy, who stays with me during the summer while his father is working. The boy's mother is a typical American parent. Although I have made many attempts to educate her on issues of diet and nutrition, my voice is entirely unheeded.

Today, his mother handed me a 2 liter bottle of soda pop, knowing I wouldn't have any, but would "need" it to take care of her son. He had also visited a convenience store shortly before a drive-thru, and was holding what amounted to a quart and a half of soda between the two beverages, along with a greasy bag of death in a bun.

Because this is the only way she knows how to feed her son, he complains endlessly about the food at my house, often not eating at all. It's extremely difficult to overrule the taste preferences that have been set for him by his mother. And, although my son is mildly supportive of my ways, he too indulges the child when he is with him.

I know I can't be the only person dealing with this issue. Does anyone have ideas/suggestions for how to handle the summertime whole-foods, plant-based blues?

[jamietwo]

That's a tough situation, but if you are watching him in your home, you can just say you don't allow animal products and junk food in your home. Then try to make great food that he'll like (easier said than done, I know!).

[Jenna]

I would do a sneaky chef approach, meaning you can hide good food in food he is willing to eat. For example, if he will eat pasta with red sauce, you can hide veggies in the sauce. Pancakes can hide lots of veggies, if you add banana. Anyway, I would start with anything he likes that you can make more healthy. Over time, you should be able to influence tastes, and perhaps even share some of the food he likes with his mother. Good luck!

[Jenna]

Also, if he likes burgers, maybe try Jeff's burgers and fries?

[oregonmom]

Honestly, you're the one watching him, unpaid I'm guessing. So you can make house rules. So whatever is not allowed in your house. And kids honestly will eat when they are hungry. When I started eating this way, my son was a carnivore. He started trying what I was eating and told me he wanted to eat this way too because the food was so much better. I didn't make a big deal of it and I think that helped. Good luck.

[MangoMama]

You might try doing activities that involve healthy food. My boys love cooking, so I find healthy recipes that we can make together. Going grocery shopping or going to the farmers market can also be an adventure to discover what is in season and ways to prepare it. This summer I also want to get out to an orchard or berry farm to pick our own fruits.

MangoMama

[ch47gunnergirl1]

I'm a stepmom of four, so I have had plenty of issues dealing with this. I go at it 2 ways: Caving in & Sneaking! I make things like bean burrito wraps, and let the boys build their own. They spend more time trying to out-do each other with hot sauce (I use torchbearer's) that they don't notice that their wrap is full of beans, tomatoes, lettuce, onions, etc. Lasagna is easy to sneak, I make a tofu herb "cheese" and an oil free spicy marinara sauce. I buy "special" sodas that they can have (in moderation) that are small batch brewed specialty sodas like root beer or ginger beer, and come in glass bottles. (they've got sugar, but all the ingredients are natural so I don't feel as bad) after that they can have lemonade, iced tea, or water. I absolutely cave when it comes to meat. There are always a few "meat days" that my husband handles the meat cooking, but I choose the cut, size, type. I kinda go with in my house if I limit their meat consumption to once a day or once every other day, I'm doing good. I make certain that they have side dishes that are healthy, mcd, and that they get plenty of the sides, and a small cut of meat. None of it is ideal, but with short visitations you aren't going to affect much change. If you really wanted to try to makes huge changes, you could try having them watch movies like Food Inc. & Forks over Knives. Coming from the tv might actually hit home for them more than from you?.?

They like to eat anything they can pick,,,so I take them out to my garden and let them eat anything they want.

I'll tell you my biggest gripe with the whole visiting with kids or adults that don't eat as we do, is I spend a ton on groceries before they come to stock up on things I would never buy normally: sugar coated cereal, milk, pancake mix, butter, cheese, meat, sodas. So I absolutely feel you aggravation. My husband still eats meat and cheese, but only about once or twice a week at home, so it doesn't add up like their habits do.

Best I can tell you is to try and give healthy options, and then see if you can make minor changes stick. Best of luck to you, hope you can make a change for their health!

[fulenn]

We have a 14 month old who has been living with us 1/2 of the week for 6 months. We began feeding her mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, carrots, oatmeal, etc. when she began eating solid food. Guess what she wants when she is really hungry now? Yep, the good stuff. But her parents and grandparents feed her french fries and soda pop. Not sure what else she gets on the days she is at the other home, but it is not what we eat. Her preferences are still what we have been feeding her, but I am not sure how long that will last. Hopefully you will be able to change your grandsons tastes over the summer. How old is he?

One thing that works with this little girl is letting her "help" us make the food.

Fulenn