pregnant and worried

Share your experience, challenges and success implementing the McDougall program with family and children.

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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby americaninca46 » Wed Oct 31, 2018 2:41 pm

Hi Fuzzy, Glad to hear you are doing well with your pregnancy. As for the flu shot, it is a personal preference. I had one flu shot many years ago and ended up with the worse flu in my life. I have never had another and so far, 40 years later , have never had the flu. All my friends get flu shots and they are always sick with the flu every year. Some even get it twice plus colds and other viruses. My one friend was actually given a flu shot while in labour. She wasn't even sure why she got out. Eat healthy and wash your hands alot. also keep your hands away from your face. Speaking of babies kicking, I read that babies kick a lot when they are in rem sleep. This is very healthy. Take care and be well. Rebia
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby Lyndzie » Sat Nov 03, 2018 5:14 pm

Good to hear things are progressing well!

I can give you my two cents. I have both gotten the flu shot while pregnant and not. Last year I didn’t, and I’m pretty sure I had the flu last January. Odds of complications from the flu are statistically low, but still greater when you are pregnant. I say, if it gives you peace of mind, go ahead and get the shot. I chose not to get it because I felt it was extremely ineffective, and I stay home with kids, so I don’t have the same amount of interaction with the general public that people who work with the public or go to school have.

You are doing so well! I admire your commitment to giving both you and your baby the best care possible.
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby Fuzzy » Thu Nov 15, 2018 2:34 am

Hi everyone, I took the flu jab last week. I guess you have to trust your doctor to some extent. Otherwise I might as well start questioning everything that she says. That would make my last two months and delivery really stressful which is also not good for the baby. What put me over the edge was talking to my GP as well and she mentioned, that a year back she had an otherwise healthy lady who got sick with the flu in the last trimester (non smoker, not sure why she emphasized that). And they actually had her in the hospital for 4 weeks, on a respirator, she was basically fighting for her life. So once my husband heard this story, he was like, ok so it's really serious. No side/undesired affects from vaccination so far.

My little one is definitely growing, my ribs and lungs are already well in her way :D . I still find it interesting how active she is one day and on the next one, she just kind of rolls around. I like the active days. Even when her kicks wake me up during the night it's kind of a nice reminder that she's really there and on her way to change our lives. I still try not to worry if she is a bit calmer on other days. I wonder, do the little ones get sore muscles as well?

We still haven't bought all the necessary stuff. What we definitely need is a car seat (otherwise we won't be able to take her home) and a bed. I'm still not panicky about not having everything prepared. I'm thinking we will have to stay in a hospital for 3/4 days anyway. In the meantime my husband can just follow the list and order everything online or buy some stuff in the local supermarket. Then it will be an emergency and we simply won't even try to find the best offer. Not my way of doing things, but I'm staying calm and trying not to nag the future dad so that he has some patience left :mrgreen:

Oh and the food. I've been craving pizza a lot the last couple of days. I like pizza, I would consider it my favorite food before going the McDougall way so it's not surprising. Since Switzerland is also the land of cheese&beef&chocolate we have a great assortment of cheeses but not vegan cheeses. A couple that I've bought in specialized stores tasted horrible and they didn't have the right consistency. Fake meat is also hard to come by, got some funny looks in the local store when I asked about it, which I find surprising. I could order it online, I'm just kind of iffy about ordering food online, since I don't know how it's transported (heat and such) plus it would take a couple of days. For now I'm waiting for the cravings to pass. I might try a homemade pizza with tomatoes and veggies, maybe that will calm down some of the triggers. We'll see.

138 pounds, a month and half to go. In class they recommended us, that after 36 weeks we might want to put some plastic on the mattress and in the family car if our water breaks during the night or on a trip. Never thought of it, but maybe a couple of towels will do the trick as well. In two week I guess I should prepare the bag as well. Not yet, don't want the little one to think she can come out yet :) . Just stay with me and grow a bit more, okay? ;) :nod:
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby Lyndzie » Thu Nov 15, 2018 6:24 am

You are doing so well! Great to hear the update. Do you have friends who can bring you a homemade meal after the baby is born? Kinda tricky with our unique diet, but maybe possible.

I highly recommend protecting your bed. Just imagine if someone dumped 500ml suddenly on your mattress in the middle of the night without warning. I bought an incontinence pad on Amazon the size of a crib, and now can use it for the baby. It totally saved our mattress this time.

How many weeks are you now?
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby Fuzzy » Thu Nov 15, 2018 7:12 am

Hi Lyndzie, thank you so much for responding. I was actually thinking of buying doggy pads in a pet store. Or wrapping the mattress in kitchen foil in the middle. But I'm afraid it will make those squeaky sounds then, plus it won't absorb anything. Incontinence pad you say, that's another option I haven't thought of. I saw they also have washable options, which would be great. And you're right then I can use it for the crib. I'll look into it for sure, thank you!
I'm in my 34th week if I'm counting correctly. From what I've read newborns born 36+ weeks rarely have any extra issues and are no longer considered to be preterm. So 36 weeks is my goal at this point. Wish I was working or that the weather would be nicer. With the winter coming time doesn't exactly fly by.
I have one really good friend. But her cooking is heavy on oil, eggs&spices. So even when she cooks vegetarian/vegan part of her meals it's too much for me to handle. I imagine she doesn't like my cooking either. Last time I made her veggies&pasta she drizzled couple of tbsp of olive oil on top of her plate :D :D I think I will just have to cook stuff more in bulks, hope my husband will respect my wishes. But at the moment we are kind of in our hair about the food but that's another subject. From your experience, did your appetite rise once you started to breastfeed your babies? I mean did you need a lot more calories compared to when you were pregnant? I've heard of stories thaht moms with newborns need to eat 7,9 times per day and that shocked me a bit. I was hoping an extra lunch or so would do ...
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby Lyndzie » Tue Nov 20, 2018 2:15 am

An incontenance pad is a large, absorbent pad for adults with bladder control issues (like the elderly in nursing homes). I bought a couple when my four year old was having accidents at night. They are extremely useful, and you will be able to use them for years. It’s for you now, then the baby (spit up and leaky diapers), then for potty training. Buy two, so when one gets dirty you can immediately replace it with a clean one while the dirty one is in the wash.

Congrats on making it to 34 weeks! Most babies are born weeks 38-42, so that is a pretty wide window if possibilities. My first was 19 days early, and the last one was 11 days late. You never know!

Bummer you don’t have anyone to cook you food. I also can relate to food being an issue. My appetite is pretty normal when nursing. I usually eat breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack and dinner, but that’s just my pattern. I gained a bunch, though, and am almost to my pre-pregnancy weight, so things might change when I don’t have extra “reserves.”

I hadn’t realized you are in Switzerland! I hear it’s absolutely lovely. Yesterday I came across a YouTube channel about a family in Switzerland with 10 children! I think they are vegan. The lady’s name is Taina Licciardo-Toivola. I’m interested to see how she feeds her kids.

Hang in there! You probably feel rather round (I know I did!). Stay nice and warm, and cook that baby. Will you be going back to work after the baby is born? I’ve heard that there are some pretty great maternity leave programs in certain parts of the world. The US is definitely lacking.
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby Fuzzy » Thu Dec 13, 2018 2:26 pm

Hello, I'm back. Week 38, just a bit more than two weeks! I'm still quite nervous about the general outcome, I hope everything goes well and is well. I still very much enjoy the little one kicking me and luckily I am still quite mobile. No swelling or digestion problems, basically no complaints. I sometimes have trouble falling asleep but that's more to do with the head and thinking what I still need to sort out before the birth. I think my legs got skinnier but with belly in the way I can't be sure :D . Swimming is still my favorite activity, walking feels a bit funny after a while and with freezing temperatures it might not be the safest option at this point.

Thank you Lyndzie for the tip about the pads! Didn't even know that this was a thing, I think I got this part covered for now. I'm still kind of hoping for the birth in January (just because of our school system) but at least now we are over the rough patch considering preterm birth.

Wow this lady, Taina Licciardo-Toivola ... I can't imagine having 10 kids and staying vegan. Or having 10 kids either way and not forgetting to feed them or leaving one of them in the store or something lol. I've looked her up a bit, a couple of videos on youtube. This is what I call a super-woman. Incredible!

Switzerland is beautiful and there is a lot of things I like about living in Switzerland. But maternity leave is not one of them. My husband and I came to Switzerland from Slovenia (also a beautiful and tiny country) and in Slovenia one of the parents (usually the mom) can stay at home with the baby for a year. Government covers the basic salary and the firm gets to hire another worker to cover the workload. Wonderful! After one year the parent can decide if s/he wants to come back to work full-time or just work 30 or 20 hours per week till the child is 4 years old. Although at this point if s/he decides for the second or third option s/he gets less money (75 or 50% so proportionally to the hours plus benefits like travel expenses) and again the company can hire a part time worker for the rest. A lot of parents go for 20 hours/week option if they can afford it of course. I'm sure some employers abuse this in some way or the other and maybe that is why women between 20-40 have more trouble actually getting a job in the first place. But I find this practice very family friendly. On top of this we get paternity leave as well, I think now its 15+15 days and (usually) dads can use this till the child is three years old. It's sometimes difficult to get a place in kindergarten, depends on the location, private care is always a possibility but it's usually quite expensive.

Switzerland is different. No paternity leave unless the firm is generous and specifies this in the contract (my husband doesn't get any). And the woman has to go back 3 months after the birth (14 weeks altogether). Kindergartens at least at our end are full and incredibly expensive. If you don't have a job at the university level, money-wise it usually pays off to have one parent at home with the child. With 2 kids or more ... almost a no go until they go to school. So I'm not going back to work, that's actually another sad topic, because I had a career back in Slovenia, here ... well let's leave it at that.

I don't know much about the system in US, from little I've heard the situation is even worse. Is it?
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby Lyndzie » Thu Dec 13, 2018 6:24 pm

So good to hear from you! Yay, only a few more weeks. You are doing so well. I was just thinking of, so great to get an update.

Slovenia sounds very family friendly, like a dream world, really! Here in the States, you can qualify for Family Medical Leave (this only applies to full time employees that have worked at the company for more than a year), which covers missing work for a variety of reasons, including birth. It can be for up to 12 weeks, but does not guaruntee pay, just that you’ll have a job when you go back. I’ve had to save up all my vacation time to get paid for part of my leaves. Day care can cost as much as college tuition ($10k per year per child), which makes it too expensive for many people. So, yes, it’s even worse here.

Though it may seem like a hardship, because of your job situation, you get to stay home with your child. So many people here can’t afford to. When a we had our first, my husband would work during the day, and then meet me in the parking lot of my job to trade the baby, and I worked in the evenings. When I finally stayed home, even though it was less money, it was so great to be home with the kids and take them to the park and just enjoy life. I hope you get to have that as well.
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby Fuzzy » Sun Dec 16, 2018 11:07 am

Hi Lyndzie, it's nice to hear that you're thinking of me. It makes me feel safer in a way. I hope you and your little ones are doing ok now as well!!
Yeah Slovenia has lots of problems but like you said, as far as family is concerned we have some nice regulations. Another great thing that we have is also free public education, all up to masters degree at the uni. But there are people who would like to make changes here as well, I hope they don't succeed. I find the idea, that you have to start your adult life with a debt, really awful.

But I guess Switzerland triumphs when it comes to costs of daily child care. I've looked into a couple of kindergartens close by (we live in a small town near Zürich so Zürich is even more expensive). The costs of daily care (full day, baby under 19 months) are about 2700-3200 per month. It's just awful. For example if you work full time (9 h/day) in Starbucks for example (maybe not only as a barista), you barely cover the low end of expenses. Not including costs for train/bus ride for you and your child that is. And public transport is also expensive around here. It's crazy isn't it? Usually the second child gets a bit of a discount, but 6000 per month for 2 children is still a crazy amount of money. And from what I've heard/read (not that this makes much of a difference) these kindergartens are not "luxurious" at all as far as number of staff, activities etc. goes. So yeah at this point I can't think about getting a job. We can't afford me getting a job which is kind of funny.

But like you said, I should be happy that we can survive on one loan. And don't get me wrong I am grateful that we are doing ok. I just feel bad for my husband. It's a lot of stress and responsibility since we are now living in a foreign country and soon three people will depend on his income. I wouldn't wish this on anyone, especially my husband.

Like you said I'm looking forward to meeting my child and spending time together. Maybe meeting other mums and kids as well. I also have this vision of going outside, playing in the forest, park etc. Fingers crossed right?
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby Lyndzie » Thu Dec 27, 2018 7:12 pm

Hi Fuzzy! How are you doing?
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby Fuzzy » Sat Dec 29, 2018 4:20 am

Still getting rounder :D, thank you for asking. I must admit I went a bit off plan in the last week or so :oops: :cry: . I know that there is no excuse. It's not like I suddenly need "minerals and vitamins" from pizza and cookies. I'll get back on track. Food in the maternity ward probably won't be McDougall friendly as well.

My friend said to me, that after birth you shouldn't eat fruit for a week. That is what she was told at least. Because it can affect milk, cause the baby to have more stomach ache/cramps. That sounds a bit strange. Especially if it's like apples, pears. I might stay off citrus fruit. But what about the berries for example, or bananas? Any idea?
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby Lyndzie » Sat Dec 29, 2018 6:37 am

You are doing so well! The holidays are tricky to navigate, and your level of compliance has been outstanding. Hospital food can be challenging as well.

There are a lot of “old wive’s tales” about what mom’s should eat when nursing, but I have never heard to avoid fruit. Just eat as you normally would, lots if health fruits and veggies and starches. It takes a few days for the milk to come in fully, so don’t worry if the baby nurses constantly until then. They have very very tiny tummies when they are first born (about the size of a cherry) and just need to be small amounts often. Do you have a lot of breastfeeding support? Most people here in the states end up doing formula, but fortunately I have a great community around me. I found oatmeal to be great for milk production (another old wive’s tale, haha).

You are so close! So exciting that you could have a baby this year or next.
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby cena » Mon Jan 14, 2019 8:34 am

Fuzzy! Did you have your baby? I have 10 children and you can ask me anything. Hoping all is well with you.
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby Fuzzy » Sun Jan 20, 2019 1:17 pm

Hi everyone, sorry for the late response. On 3.1 we got our baby girl! Healthy, lively and loud (especially on the changing table :D ). We're still trying to get to know her and figure out what she needs and when.

I'm still not sure if I should listen to people when they tell me I shouldn't eat beans, broccoli, tomatoes ... It's like every person and every mum has her list of "forbidden foods" and if I put them together and want to stay in the McDougall lines I would only be eating potatoes, rice and maybe pasta. :cry: :cry: . What fruits and vegetables would be ok? And are beans really an issue, I mean I've been eating them like crazy during pregnancy. I'm still low on iron so I would like to continue eating them. I lost all pregnancy weight in the hospital already and since I got home I keep losing it even though I've been eating every chance I get. Added lots of nuts, nut butter but still.

Oh god Cena ten kids!! How?? I have maybe just one more question at the moment, does it get at least a little bit easier after a while? Because at this point I can't really understand how people can have more than one child at a time. I feel like we're barely surviving. We worry a lot about everything. And I must admit I feel exhausted and guilty!! When she is awake, fed and with a fresh diaper I should probably spent more time with her! But sometimes I'm just trying to keep my eyes open and hoping she falls asleep as well. I already feel like I'm always forgetting something and I'm not feeling like a good mum at the moment. I do talk to her during the breastfeeding at least and sing to her when she falls asleep. I do try to cuddle her in between as well but I just feel I should do more. And seriously what is it about changing a wet diaper that the kids hate so much? She doesn't want to get undressed, ok I get it, it can get a bit cold this way. But then she also doesn't want her clothes back for some reason. I'm sure with 10 kids you find this hilarious but really, do you get a hang of it eventually?!!

Like last night I fed her at 3AM, she got a bit sleepy, I put her in her crib and she fussed a bit but then fell asleep. I went to bed next to her crib and then I heard that she pooped. I admit I almost cried, is this a normal reaction :oops: ? Of course after I changed her, she was completely awake because of the crying. Wouldn't even take the breast to calm down. In a way I know it's just bad timing and it's not like I did anything wrong but I still feel like I'm failing. And don't worry I'm not depressed or anything just wondering if this is all normal and will it pass??
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Re: pregnant and worried

Postby jamietwo » Sun Jan 20, 2019 8:08 pm

Congratulations Fuzzy! You're doing just fine! Everything you've said sounds normal to me. :nod: I had never even changed a diaper until my son was born, but I got to be pretty adept at that and everything else. It just takes time to find your groove, and everything seems harder when you're sleep-deprived. That will get better too! Your baby is already used to your diet! Just eat what you normally would eat, and if a food does cause a reaction, you can go easy on that one food for a while. Its all good! Keep us posted on how you're doing!
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